Virtually every streaming crime series I’ve seen, no matter how high or low the quality or what the country of origin, includes the following elements [disclaimer – I’ve read little detective fiction, so can’t say if something similar holds true for novels]:
- major characters [especially women] look so alike it’s difficult to keep track of who they are
- all major characters have destructive parents, troubled children, and/or collapsed marriages
- lead police officers are distant, obnoxious, and/or emotionally tormented by nature
- someone on the police force in a high supervisory capacity is deeply corrupt
- all corporate figures are shits
- all attempts to solve an ongoing series of crimes have been met with utter incompetence until a new, untried, or semi-disgraced investigator is put in charge
- this new hire is not given adequate budget or tools to do the job
- whenever anyone says “thank you,” it has deep emotional meaning
- the investigator and an informant will meet at least once in an public space, observed by their enemy
- food preference will be used to define characters’ approach to life
- someone whose testimony or position in an investigation is crucial will be killed by a speeding car while crossing the street
- during in-car conversation, the driver will continually turn to look at the passenger, rather than pay attention to the road
- every major building or large house will have an overwhelming, multi-floor staircase that invites continual chase scenes, whether such chases make sense or not
- the good chaser always catches the felon being chased, even if the latter has longer legs and a more athletic stride
- officers and detectives will insert “fuck” into every sentence
- all floor lamps or tall desk lamps have the same shade – white, fairly clear, with burlap or similar fabric covering
- a third to a half of major villains will end up shooting themselves in the mouth or under the chin, spreading blood across the ceiling
* * * *
Stump calls himself “a very stable genius.” Does this mean he has the intelligence of a horse?
* * * *
Little known fact: It would take 6.02214076×10²³ avocados to form a sphere the size of the Earth. Thus, the basic numerical unit, Avocados’ Number.
* * * *
I’m surprised to see so little in the media about how Rump has chosen people with colossal ignorance to run government departments. Commentators seem perplexed every time an agency head shows total boneheadedness about science, economics, or the mission of whichever agency he or she has been dumped on.
This is not accidental – it’s Frump’s deliberate attempt at self-protection, by surrounding himself with boobs who cam never challenge him, since they can seldom get out of bed in the morning without help.
A functioning mind might pose a threat to the god-king.
lickhaven 